Do's & Don'ts
I received a package from my midwife with a bunch of information for women having babies. If all goes as planned, we're hoping to be home from the hospital fairly quickly. They have some "commonsense rules for postpartum guests presented in good humour"...
* * DO'S * *
-call before you come and arrange a visit time that is convenient for the parents.
-wash your hands well before touching the baby.
-keep your visits short. 15-20 minutes is good.
-bring food offerings. Suppers particularly come in handy. You may bring frozen dishes, or plan in advance to serve an entire supper.
-offer your opinion when asked for (that one makes me giggle)
-offer to wash some dishes, take home some laundry, run the vacuum, iron, etc (I added ironing to the list - I haven't ironed for weeks because I just wait until my Mom comes to visit and then get her to do it - thanks Mom!)
-offer to look after older siblings
-respect the parent's need to do their own thing, in their own way, and on their own time
* * DON'TS * *
-do not bring the whole family and settle in for the afternoon
-do not accept offers of tea unless you make it and clean up afterward
-do not tell the parent's that you hate the baby's name
-do not smoke inside the house
-do not give unsolicited advice
-do not expect the new mother to leave the room to nurse her baby
-do not ask to hold the baby. Wait for an offer
* * DO'S * *
-call before you come and arrange a visit time that is convenient for the parents.
-wash your hands well before touching the baby.
-keep your visits short. 15-20 minutes is good.
-bring food offerings. Suppers particularly come in handy. You may bring frozen dishes, or plan in advance to serve an entire supper.
-offer your opinion when asked for (that one makes me giggle)
-offer to wash some dishes, take home some laundry, run the vacuum, iron, etc (I added ironing to the list - I haven't ironed for weeks because I just wait until my Mom comes to visit and then get her to do it - thanks Mom!)
-offer to look after older siblings
-respect the parent's need to do their own thing, in their own way, and on their own time
* * DON'TS * *
-do not bring the whole family and settle in for the afternoon
-do not accept offers of tea unless you make it and clean up afterward
-do not tell the parent's that you hate the baby's name
-do not smoke inside the house
-do not give unsolicited advice
-do not expect the new mother to leave the room to nurse her baby
-do not ask to hold the baby. Wait for an offer
posted by Sherri Lavender at
9:10 PM
2 Comments:
these all take me right back to the day. .Hospital stays were 4 days back then, no rooming in and so many ppl visted and i was exhausted - they were all so happy and good intentioned but it was tough! When we brought Lindsay home i was so nervous about everything. it was all sinking in very quickly, the responsibility and such. I was an emotional basketcase. We had just got in with our new little baby, when Rob's dad and mom and their house guest, some lady from Indonesia just showed up out of the blue and i FREAKED! i was crying and telling Rob to please send them away. .(not in front of them!) but of course he didn't and they came in and of course stayed too long - Dad knew what was wrong with me and said "So, you're having the blues, eh? They won't last." He was right - i was overwhelmed and he was also right that it didn't last. I wanted to say though "If you know i'm having them, why don't you come back in a few days?!!!" ha ha!
By
kathryn, At
2:35 PM
That is some good advice! Some of those thing should be a given though..like 'don't smoke in the house' and 'don't tell the parents you hate the baby's name'!I personally prefer people to leave me alone for about a week after the baby's born, because it can be really overwhelming and the last thing you want is people around bugging you..I had that happen after James was born..my milk had just come in so my boobs were killing me, I was exhausted from not sleeping, I had ripped really bad and my stitches were sore beyond belief, and I had the baby blues. And yet, people still visited!
By
Anonymous, At
4:21 PM
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